Every season, at least one coaching friend asks my advice on getting parents to do something and/or change their behavior.


The most frequent example is getting parents to stop coaching from the sidelines. Influencing people that you don’t control to change their behavior is extremely difficult – but it’s not impossible.




In his seminal book, How to Win Friends and Influence People author Dale Carnegie argues that you can change other people’s behavior simply by changing your own. It teaches you the principles to better understand people, become a more likable person, improve relationships, win others over, and influence behavior through leadership. These lessons are as relevant today as they were in 1936 when the book was first published.


Personally, I read this book each year and strongly recommend it to everyone, especially youth soccer coaches. There are so many great lessons from the book. One of the most important is:


When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.


12 Things This Book Will Do For You

  1. Get you out of a mental rut, give you new thoughts, new visions, and new ambitions.
  2. Enable you to make friends quickly and easily.
  3. Increase your popularity.
  4. Help you to win people to your way of thinking.
  5. Increase your influence, your prestige, and your ability to get things done.
  6. Enable you to win new clients and new customers.
  7. Increase your earning power.
  8. Make you a better salesman, a better executive.
  9. Help you to handle complaints, avoid arguments, and keep your human contacts smooth and pleasant.
  10. Make you a better speaker, a more entertaining conversationalist.
  11. Make the principles of psychology easy for you to apply in your daily contacts.
  12. Help you to arouse enthusiasm among your associates.


Read this to learn more.